Wednesday Re-focus: I Hate the Jets

by JohnHannahRules on Nov 18, 2009 12:33 PM EST

These two original AFL franchises will meet for the 101st time this week, with the Jest holding a 50-49 advantage; there has been one tie. The Patriots have played the Jets more than any other team in their thirty-nine year history. Over that time, emotions around the game have rolled up and down from indifference when either team was irrelevant, to something like sympathy as the formerly moribund Patriots found their way to the 2001 Super Bowl and offered hope that the AFC East might find its way back to the elite. For myself, however, any hint of fellow-feeling was erased by a 2007 trip to the Meadowlands for opening day. So let me set this on the table:

I hate the Jets. I hate the team. I disdain their fanbase. I will make no bones about it. This is nothing like the "hate" I have for the Colts. The Colts you can respect. The Steelers, you can respect. The Jets are beneath contempt. They are the worst of New York, the dregs of the tri-state area and a blight on the face of the AFC. In Rex Ryan they have found their apotheosis: a loud-mouthed ass who yaks when he wins, whines when he loses, and generally shows his ample hind-parts every time he goes out in public. Their fans have no relationship with reality, no sense of propriety and zero class. If this starts a full-fledged flame way, fine. I don't care. Don't blame MaPatsFan, who knows better than me.

I can compartmentalize, though. I have much respect for Kris Jenkins (injured). Leon Washington is a threat (injured). They have a very serious offensive line, led by Alan Faneca, Jason Ferguson and Nick Mangold (who deserves more credit as a top-shelf center). But the stink that surrounds this franchise is not the fault of the fens which surround it, but rather the barely animate homunculi which drag themselves from the mire to gibber in brainless orgy at the direction of a scabby inebriate whose single lesson in spelling fails to take hold in the webby, vacant brain-pans of those idiots bound by habit alone to drool on this "franchise" in their borrowed stadium.

So no. I don't like the Jets very much.

The views expressed in these FanPosts are not necessarily those of the writers or SBNation.

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Comments

That was one heck of a sentence there JHR.

But the stink that surrounds this franchise is not the fault of the fens which surround it, but rather the barely animate homunculi which drag themselves from the mire to gibber in brainless orgy at the direction of a scabby inebriate whose single lesson in spelling fails to take hold in the webby, vacant brain-pans of those idiots bound by habit alone to drool on this “franchise” in their borrowed stadium.

Poetic. Truthful. Awesome.

Keep the faith!

by Marima on Nov 18, 2009 12:45 PM EST reply actions

So tell me,

how do you really feel about them? ;)

Phin-bassador/ Head Weatherman/ Injury Specialist of the Phinsider.

Bender: Who wants dolphin? Leela: Dolphin? But dolphins are intelligent. Bender: Not this one. He blew all his money on instant lottery tickets.

Hey little sister shot gun!

by Farorefox on Nov 18, 2009 2:23 PM EST reply actions

dude, its actually called the bi-planes not the jets.

and plz cry rex, after the game

by NinjaZX6R on Nov 18, 2009 2:26 PM EST reply actions

Look John, it's not good to block. You gotta let your real feelings out.

We’re here for you when you want to talk.

My life has been a trivial pursuit. Trivia: where three roads meet.
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.

by SlotMachinePlayer on Nov 18, 2009 4:24 PM EST reply actions

Come hither, lonely pilgrim, and tell us what you feel.

You know a flame war is predicated upon both sides being able to read and write?

You might get a few scribbled posts of garbled text. On closer inspection, those posts will look suspiciously like someone banged a mangled, knobbly forehead on a keyboard. That’d be it, though.

Token southern hemisphere guy - 14,688km from Foxboro. That's 9128 miles, for you heathens.

by Comedic.Sans on Nov 18, 2009 5:16 PM EST reply actions

I'm worried

And concerned for the mental health of Rex Cryin’

by sirpinochle on Nov 18, 2009 5:31 PM EST reply actions

Actually, I sat down to write a game preview, but this is all I could get out.

I figured, “go with it.” It iz the internets, after all, so why censor myself? It’ll only be here forever…

As Mr. Sloan always says, there is no "I" in team, but there is an "I" in pie. And there's an "I" in meat pie. Anagram of meat is team... I don't know what he's talking about. --Shaun of the Dead

by JohnHannahRules on Nov 18, 2009 5:35 PM EST reply actions

Hence the need for anonymity

I may run for President some day. Plausible deniablility, that’s the ticket.

My life has been a trivial pursuit. Trivia: where three roads meet.
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.

by SlotMachinePlayer on Nov 18, 2009 5:54 PM EST up reply actions

You mentioned politics!

Off to the naughty box you go. Dick Jauron’s saving a seat for you, althought maybe you’d rather shed a tear with Rex Ryan.

Token southern hemisphere guy - 14,688km from Foxboro. That's 9128 miles, for you heathens.

by Comedic.Sans on Nov 18, 2009 5:56 PM EST up reply actions

Don't teams have presidents?

(Trying for the quick political save)

My life has been a trivial pursuit. Trivia: where three roads meet.
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.

by SlotMachinePlayer on Nov 18, 2009 5:58 PM EST up reply actions

Besides, I was misquoted.

No need to look up there at what I wrote, keep your eyes down here at what I’m writing. That’s the ticket.

My life has been a trivial pursuit. Trivia: where three roads meet.
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.

by SlotMachinePlayer on Nov 18, 2009 5:59 PM EST up reply actions

Like that would save you, psh.

Whatever gave you that idea? What newspapers do you read?

I’ll stop there. Aha.

Token southern hemisphere guy - 14,688km from Foxboro. That's 9128 miles, for you heathens.

by Comedic.Sans on Nov 18, 2009 6:01 PM EST up reply actions

Talking about the Jets is painful, I've decided subsequently...

The Jets defence looks toothless without Jenkins being Jenkins. What, you’re actually allowed to put pressure on the opposition’s O-line? By running into them and pushing them, you say? Blasphemy! I’d ask the coach to confirm, but he’s running through the tissues at the moment.

The Jets passing game isn’t great – a rookie QB and no checkdown options? Ugly. Leon Washington’s on IR and Dustin Keller suddenly doesn’t look so great any more (injured?). The best receiver he can throw to is better at beating up basketball support staff than beating coverages.

Given how ugly the passing game is, it’s no surprise that the Jets run offence looks decidedly average. Defences can stack the box, and without Washington the running back corps is merely solid, not explosive. Solid might be great if you have a passing game, but when the opposition knows you have to run, it’s predictable. And predictability can get you killed, or at the least smooshed over several square feet of turf. One or the other.

Coaching – Rex CRyan. Make what you will of that. If he was playing the Steelers, he might need a Terrible Towel or five. Aww.

Token southern hemisphere guy - 14,688km from Foxboro. That's 9128 miles, for you heathens.

by Comedic.Sans on Nov 18, 2009 6:12 PM EST up reply actions

I get a lot of crap for this.

Since I am a Mets fan, I have people come up to me and ask me why I’m not a Jet fan as well. I know Giants-Mets fans who get asked that question as well. It annoys me still to this day.

Beer is good! And stuff!

by R_Adragna on Nov 19, 2009 12:18 AM EST reply actions

so

so according to your opinion, are giant fans more likely to be yankee fans or mets fans?
also are jets fans more likely to be yankee fans or mets fans?
thanks

by NinjaZX6R on Nov 19, 2009 2:17 AM EST up reply actions

It's not just my opinion, it's the general consenus'.

The general assumption from New Yorkers is that Mets fans tend to root for the Jets. Meanwhile Yanks fans are likely to root for the Giants. Now I know people that break that stereotype, but the majority of New Yorkers follow it, one way or another.

Beer is good! And stuff!

by R_Adragna on Nov 19, 2009 9:31 AM EST up reply actions