What if Brad Childress was smarter than anybody thought?
by SlotMachinePlayer on Aug 31, 2009 6:45 PM EDT
Email
Print
Personally, I think Chilly is dumber than a box of rocks. He looks like the result of many generations of inbreeding. His offensive genius is going to shorten Adrian Peterson's career, and his plays are laughably predictable. But just suppose, for a moment, that all of that is a ruse. Maybe he is ruthless, cunning, and sinister.
Take Minnesota's nemesis, #4 Brett Favre formerly of the hated Green Bay Packers. Suppose that Chilly really hated Green Bay's iconic hero and wanted to bring him down. He didn't want to just hurt him, he wanted to humiliate him, destroy his image and reputation. He wanted to break him.
Brad knows that Favre hates the pre-season, and that Green Bay has a new young buck lined up behind the veteran hero. Brad calls to Brett on his Green Bay Issued cell phone, and convinces him to make a play for Minnesota. He assures him that Brett will never have to take part in any pre-season OTA's or training camps. Brad assures him, that Brett already knows the offense, or the offense can change to Brett's liking. It sounds good, maybe too good.
Brett makes his play, but Green Bay says Minnesota won't happen. That's OK, Brad already knew that, just as he knew that Brett's reputation would be soiled for trying. It's all part of the master plan. Instead, the Packers sent Brett to be a Jet. With Brett's desire to force plays, Brad knew it was just a matter of time before Brett would tank the Jets season and possibly get his coach fired. Another stain on an already stained reputation; Brad was loving it.
The game was far from over. Brad convinced Brett that by trying to "retire" from the Jets, he would be free to rejoin the Packers or, more importantly, the Vikings. The Jets were more than happy to jettison their locker room cancer and avoid looking like bad guys. Brad worked with Brett on the timing of the retired/unretire drama to set the stage for Brett's drama queen dramatic comeback. The meer act of wearing purple would tear apart Brett's entire legacy. Brad assured him that, "Real Green Bay fans would understand." Stroking Brett's massive ego along the way.
A little action in the pre-season, the "Brett's the savior of the Vikings" speech; all calculated. All pointing to the hours before game 1 when Brad would bench Brett, breaking his consecutive start streak, in favor of Tavaris "deer in the headlights" Jackson. The insult to the veteran, the shattering of his ego. It would be worth it, it would all be worth it.
Yes, that is what could have happened, or Brad Childress is truly clueless and Favre is an egomaniacal jerk.
Your pick.
The poll indicates that most people think Brett Favre is an egomaniacal jerk and Brad Childress is clueless; the rest are living in denial.
The views expressed in these FanPosts are not necessarily those of the writers or SBNation.
28 comments
|
0 recs |
Do you like this story?
Comments
Is Brad Childress smarter than a 5th grader?
My money’s on the 5th grader every time.
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.
by SlotMachinePlayer on Aug 31, 2009 6:48 PM EDT reply actions
Forget the fifth grader
That’s too easy. A better question is whether Brad Childress is smarter than box of rocks. That may actually be a fair competition.
I think we've found a subject
upon which we can actually agree.
/bows head in moment of silence
"I throw, you catch. It's NOT that hard!"
Peyton Manning, SNL, 2007
LOL
yeah, ok.
"I throw, you catch. It's NOT that hard!"
Peyton Manning, SNL, 2007
by peytonsthebest on Sep 1, 2009 11:43 AM EDT up reply actions
Childress would love to be thought of as an evil puppetmaster...
He tries to tell the press how he outsmarted the great and powerful Bill Belichick in the Draft…so even if he was one – which he is not – I’d never give him the satisfaction by calling him one. He couldn’t be an evil puppetmaster if he tried, no matter how anal and obsessive-compulsive he is.
I can’t stand Brad “Favre-calls-me-‘chilly’-but-I-still-look-like-an-accountant” Childress, almost as much as I can’t stand Mangini.
Keep the faith!
My thought was more math teacher.
As you know, not all of us bean counters look like the stereotype. ;-)
"I throw, you catch. It's NOT that hard!"
Peyton Manning, SNL, 2007
by peytonsthebest on Sep 1, 2009 11:44 AM EDT up reply actions
Right, some are worse:
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.
by SlotMachinePlayer on Sep 1, 2009 11:53 AM EDT up reply actions
haha
a little self-deprecating humor there, but you’re right. And besides, I at least have hair.
Keep the faith!
I understand his entire family has mustaches.
Grandpa, dad, mom, great aunt Trudy, all of them.
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.
by SlotMachinePlayer on Sep 1, 2009 12:42 PM EDT up reply actions
Genetics
All his family have them? Sound like they breed true. The Childress family tree being more of a narrow, lopsided shrub?
His family tree is a bamboo.
Not alot of branches there.
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.
by SlotMachinePlayer on Sep 1, 2009 6:03 PM EDT up reply actions
Sorry about that, Here is the picture
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.
by SlotMachinePlayer on Sep 1, 2009 6:05 PM EDT up reply actions
D-line adjustments
I’m hoping for a pair of 800lb black-and-white free agents by the name of Ling-Ling and Tsu-Tsu from Szechuan to be at DE, all of a sudden.
by Comedic.Sans on Sep 1, 2009 10:47 PM EDT up reply actions
LOL
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.
by SlotMachinePlayer on Sep 2, 2009 7:59 AM EDT up reply actions
thanks?
why don’t you go over there and say that.
Don't question my fandominium.
"the notorious D.I.B."- samdaman
by dolphinsinbuffalo on Aug 31, 2009 10:51 PM EDT up reply actions
ha coming froms a pats fan
lmfao
"Life's a bi*ch but god forbid the bi*ch divorce me"- Nas
"They ask me what I'm writin' for; I'm writin' to show you what we fightin' for"- Talib Kweli
by Davone_Is_BessT on Sep 3, 2009 12:30 AM EDT up reply actions
How witty and incisive.
Beware the return of that brilliant debate argument “No U”. It’s impossible to defeat.
he started it
lol
"Life's a bi*ch but god forbid the bi*ch divorce me"- Nas
"They ask me what I'm writin' for; I'm writin' to show you what we fightin' for"- Talib Kweli
by Davone_Is_BessT on Sep 3, 2009 3:53 PM EDT up reply actions
this quote couldn't be any more true.
He looks like the result of many generations of inbreeding.
funny article. I voted for the second one.
Don't question my fandominium.
"the notorious D.I.B."- samdaman
by dolphinsinbuffalo on Aug 31, 2009 10:51 PM EDT reply actions
What is the most amusing to me...
is that Childress was brought in to be an offensive genius.
My middle son is just starting football. As he watches games, he calls out (pre-snap) what the play is going to be. Alot of teams show run, then pass. Show pass, then run.
My son is almost 100% correct on his pre-snap reads of the Vikings. It has us rolling on the floor laughing, literally.
My son, the defensive genius. My chest swells with pride. :-)
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.
by SlotMachinePlayer on Sep 1, 2009 1:13 PM EDT reply actions
Unfortunately, my son is older than 5th grade.
The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.
by SlotMachinePlayer on Sep 1, 2009 1:14 PM EDT up reply actions
Comments For This Post Are Closed
Secondary Sidebar
User Tools
Media requests: Please email patspulpit at gmail.com
FanPosts
Community blog posts and discussion.
Certain photos copyright © 2012 by Associated Press or Getty Images. Any commercial use or distribution without the express written consent of Associated Press and Getty Images is strictly prohibited.
