FanPost

Steal This Thread - So close to the draft, I could spit Edition

 

By now you know the drill:

This thread (named in dubious honor [or honour for Comedic.Sans] of a book titled Steal This Book) is a thread that was designed to be stolen.  Random thoughts, check.  Inane observations, perfectly fine.  Multiple segues, the more the merrier.  Goofy pictures, haiku, whatever.  If the thread gets unwieldy, I'll create a new sandbox for us to play in.  Feel free to jump in, the water's fine.

First off, let me start by apologizing for not slapping one of these up sooner.  Personal life has been interfering with public mania and that should not be allowed to happen.  We'll see how it goes in the future.

Anyway, I think Richard has done an outstanding job of bringing draft coverage to a feverish pitch.  Comedic has done a great job of analysing possible needs.  R_Adragna did a wonderful job of bringing the realism of the draft to our own private war rooms.  Now all I can say is bring on the freaking draft already.  We've been window shopping for months it seems, and now it's time to spend some money. 

If you're a husband or a boyfriend, you've probably been trapped into "going shopping".  At first, you're looking to be frugal, but after hours of, "Do these pumps make my ankles look fat?", you're willing to sell the fillings in your teeth to get out of there.  Especially if she made you hold her purse.  It's no use trying to fight back.  You could even pretend (or maybe some of you aren't pretending) to like those pumps for yourself to let her see what it's like from your side.  That won't work.  Next thing you know, she likes the idea of "dress up", and you're stuck in the store for four more hours as she's feverishly buying "darling little outfits" for you.  Not that I speak from experience or anything....

Anyway, we've been window shopping long enough and it's time to spend some money.  Pass rushers?  Wide Receivers?  Future draft picks?  Where will our 12 picks go?  Given that they've spread the draft over three days, this is going to be the shopping spree from hell.  Oh, look at the darling little Defensive End we bought at #22.  Tomorrow we go shopping for Outside Linebackers.  Gag me, I'm a sprint shopper and pride myself in how little time I spend in the store.  I may ignore the whole thing until Sunday and see where we are then.  At least I would if they didn't have me hooked.  Home shopping NFL network, here I come.

One things for sure, once we get through this ordeal, this is the draft I'll be looking forward to:

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The views expressed in these FanPosts are not necessarily those of the writers or SBNation.

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