The Patriots should sign Dez Bryant. It couldn’t be more obvious.
Which is why it’s not going to happen.
If there’s one thing that has been consistent about the Patriots’ trades, draft picks, and acquisitions over the years, it’s that there has been no consistency whatsoever and more often than not nobody has any idea what’s going on over at One Patriot Place. Bill Belichick makes the moves that he thinks is best for the team, and that’s all there is to it. Every prediction, every mock draft, every ideal trade partner...they almost always end up completely useless as the Patriots zig when we all think they are going to zag. With very few exceptions, when the peanut gallery thinks the Patriots should do something, it’s all but a certainty that they will not be doing that thing.
The Patriots are very thin at receiver. They just released Kenny Britt. Julian Edelman will miss a quarter of the season. They could use someone to come in to give the offense a layer that they just don’t have right now - perhaps an athletic, versatile veteran who has had some issues both on and off the field as of late and who would do well to come to a team known for rehabbing troubled players. Maybe someone who recently said that Tom Brady is his favorite player, is looking to play for a contender, and will likely sign a low-money, incentive laden deal in order to show the rest of the league that he’s still got it. Someone like...oh, I don’t know...Dez Bryant?
To be honest, I’m not the biggest Bryant fan in the world. He has trouble getting separation, his route tree is a bit limited, and he clearly has shown himself to be difficult at times. But I also think that New England has absolutely nothing to lose bringing him in on a one year prove it deal, as he’s a physical force that defenses absolutely have to account for even if all he does is run a Go Route on ever single snap. And Bryant has everything to gain signing that one year prove it deal; he could get a legit shot at a Super Bowl and show the league that he can be a team player and make a difference in an offense.
The move makes all the sense in the world. It’s a move that anyone would make in Bill Belichick’s position. But since this is the Patriots, and a surefire way to ensure a move never happens is to predict that move, we should all probably just stop talking about it now. Because it’s not happening.
EDITOR’S NOTE: When the Patriots sign Bryant early next week after the Panthers game, feel free to give me all the credit. I’m wrong about everything, so this article just put things back on the right track.