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Like a lot of us, 10-year NFL vet and former Patriots wide receiver Donté Stallworth powered through another Monday to do what most Americans start thinking about at around 9:47am every Monday: chilling out and watching Monday Night Football.
So while most Patriots fans watched the Monday game knowing that their team was sitting pretty even though New England didn’t even play this weekend, Donté was watching and saw a play that ended in disaster for the Seahawks and reminded him of a Great Moment in Patriots History that we here at the Pulpit revere on par with the mighty Buttfumble. A tradition unlike any other.
But first, Donté made sure to offer his veteran advice to offensive linemen everywhere - don’t try this at home, unless, well, you’ll see.
We’re talking about this “oh no baby what is you doing?” moment where....just watch it.
How did Ifedi think this was going to go? pic.twitter.com/b3XOvczDtS
— Dieter Kurtenbach (@dieter) November 12, 2019
That’s not how you do it!
Although to be fair to Seattle, at least this is a different offensive line problem from...their last few seasons of finding new offensive line problems, so, there’s that. There’s a joke in here somewhere about owning and maintaining a German automobile, but it’s late and I’m tired.
Which led to Stallworth offering these words to live by:
and a note to all offensive lineman, and I mean this with nothing but love and respect. y’all are the best teammates on every team, but pls don’t attempt to pick up the ball (or take it from your QB) and run with it — unless your name is Dan Connolly
— Donté Stallworth (@DonteStallworth) November 12, 2019
And because knowledge is power, Stallworth helpfully linked the video:
— Donté Stallworth (@DonteStallworth) November 12, 2019
While there are presumably many Dan Connollys around the world, Donté’s right — there’s only one (1) Dan Connolly that can do this. Fire up the throwback machine!
Aaaaaaahhhhh. It always goes down smooth.