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A New England Patriots Night Before Christmas

Merry Christmas from Pats Pulpit!

NFL: DEC 24 Jets at Patriots Photo by Rich Graessle/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images

‘Twas the night before Christmas and all over the land
Not a soul was awake except for one man.
“There are no days off!” he thought to himself
“That’s especially true without old No. 12”
Plays had to be drawn up and coverages set
Now was not the time to crawl into bed.
So he sat in his study and watched an old game
From the ‘86 Rams, ‘twas an attempt to gain
Just a little advantage for what was to come;
A game with the Bills, a club that just won
The AFC East for the very first time
Since the mid-1990s. That team was quite fine.
He had just settled his brain on a particular play
When outside his window he heard someone say:

“Now, MyGerms! Now, JWhite! And, Buzzo and Dame!
Come on Little Mike! Doughboy! Dirty Dave!
Let’s get in formation, let’s try out that play.
Let’s make our coach proud on Christmas Day!”
Coach stood up from his desk and over he went
To peek through the window and catch that event.
And there they all stood, set up in full gear
Using shifts and motions as if game day was here.
They ran zero blitzes, they ran counter plays,
They used max protection in various ways.
And there was Cam Newton commanding his crew,
With the defense reacting, playing excellent too.
The practice was flawless, execution superb,
and all through the scrambling one suddenly heard.

“What a pleasant surprise, I don’t know what to say.”
And the Coach’s heart grew three sizes that day.
“No VHS copy of ‘My Cousin Vinny,’
No Bon Jovi album on my new iPod Mini,
No hoodies with sleeves already cut off,
No functioning car clocks, nothing of that stuff.
There could be no gift better than this here scene
Nothing I’d want more than a hard-working team!”
So, he watched his players do their jobs
and when they were done — in case they forgot —
He reminded them all as they jogged out of sight:
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”

A very merry Christmas from all of us here at Pats Pulpit!