(Editor’s Note: the following is not intended to be taken seriously, at all)
Hello all,
I hope this email finds you well in these uncertain tim... whoops, sorry, wrong browser tab. You know how it goes.
Any good news regarding the 2020 Patriots is reason enough to celebrate, and the word that center, captain, and first-class turkey hunter David Andrews will return for the upcoming season will almost certainly be a power-up to an offensive line that was consistently inconsistent in 2019. Here’s what Andrews had to say about finally being able to get back out there and hit people this year (via MassLive):
“I’m very fortunate that I am able to continue playing this game,” Andrews said on a video conference call. “I’m very appreciative for all the support I received from my family, my friends, my wife, but really the organization as a whole. From the Kraft family down to coach (Bill) Belichick, to Josh (McDaniels), (Dante Scarnecchia), all the coaches.
[...]
Are there any restrictions moving forward?
“I haven’t been told that,” Andrews replied. “Part of it was the medicine I was on and I’m off that medicine so I can go about living my normal life.... I think it was just kind of a freak accident thing.”
The center didn’t want to get into his medical situation beyond that.
“I’m cleared to play football,” Andrews said. “I want to move forward with that and talk about football. What happened happened. You can’t live your life in fear if it’s going to happen again or not. It’s a violent game and things happen. There’s a lot of things that happen. That’s just life.”
Glorious news. Truly. How about that whole “playing with a quarterback that’s not the GOAT for the first time in your entire NFL career” part? (also via MassLive)
“I think you don’t do anything out of the ordinary,” Andrews said on a video conference call. “I think leadership, sometimes can be — you can kinda see through it if there’s some BS in it. Be who you are. Do what got you here. Just do it better and do it more. I think it just is what it is. It’s being in the NFL. It’s part of this business. There doesn’t need to be a Superman anywhere. We just need to go out there and do our jobs collectively as a group.”
Having said that, Andrews will certainly miss snapping to Brady.
“Obviously Tommy is who Tommy is,” the center said. “What a great experience it was to get to play with him. Appreciative of him and our friendship that we have. He’s kinda the longest quarterback I’ve ever played with in any of the stages of my football career. So it’s always a special bond and we’ll remain friends for life.”
Sounds about right. The GOAT is gone, it is what it is, and everyone else needs to step up and do their job and... hey wait a second. There doesn’t need to be a what now?
There doesn’t need to be a Superman anywhere. We just need to go out there and do our jobs collectively as a group.
Enhance....
There doesn’t need to be a Superman anywhere.
ENHANCE....
SUPERMAN
My memory’s a bit fuzzy, is there a particular former MVP quarterback that just so happens to be a free agent at the ripe old age of 30 and use Superman as the inspiration for his oft-repeated touchdown celebration?
One that everyone is positively bamboozled is still a free agent and even more so bamboozled that the Patriots haven’t moved heaven and earth to sign him?
Why the Patriots should sign former 'Public Enemy No. 1' Cam Newton https://t.co/sN7CDC3ZLo
— Doug Farrar (@NFL_DougFarrar) May 1, 2020
Here's my Q about the Pats: I understand that they like Stidham. I believe it! But why not bring in...someone...as insurance or competition?
— Mina Kimes (@minakimes) May 5, 2020
Cam Newton once was poised to become the face of the league, and now he's without a franchise. Where could he sign—and why are teams so reluctant to give a player known for superhuman feats a shot?@rodger: https://t.co/l2uNrL00XU
— The Ringer (@ringer) May 4, 2020
Patriots are betting favorites to sign Cam Newton https://t.co/BFR9J1kY3m
— ProFootballTalk (@ProFootballTalk) April 27, 2020
The same Cam Newton that does....oh right, that:
Meanwhile, the Patriots appear to be dead set on heading into 2020 with the fearsome foursome of Jarrett Stidham (also an Auburn alum, as you may have heard), grizzled veteran Brian Hoyer, and UDFA rookie tandem J’Mar Smith and Brian Lewerke at QB.
David Andrews’ quote is probably just a coincidence though.
P.S. Feet.